Monday, May 5, 2008

Derby Notes

Well, after three days and nights of stimulating a 9" rise into the the proverbial fly of the Louisville, KY economy, my friends and I have returned home. I'm not sure if anything valuable was learned on this trip or not. Oh wait, there was one thing. Black eyes are awesome. I look like this dude.

Black eyes and slap fights in busy bars are pretty much the funniest things ever. That and telling every Cubs fan you see that you think their squad is garbage. I only got one good response. It was, "Go fuck yourself!" It was the only answer that I respected all day. Most of those losers were like, "Yeah. I know. This may be our year though. Soriano's hurt now. Just wait til he gets back." I was begging a Cubs fan to hit me in the face all day long. Turns out I had to settle for a stiff right jab from one Michael Patrick Dolan. I will be paying dearly karma-wise for the rest of the year for many of my actions/words in bars around Louisville. For the most part though, I think i was tipping enough to maybe balance it out a bit.

Apparently a horse died in the derby race. I found out about this the next day as I didn't see a single horse all day on Saturday. Not even an image of a horse on a screen. That's how cool the KY Derby is. The horses are a complete afterthought to the debauchery and comaraderie shared by my friends, myself, and anyone with the good sense to not wear a Cubs shirt to a big event. Use it, abuse it, put it away wet, get it out again tomorrow. Getchu some! Get after it! Do somethin with it!

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